Thoughts and Ramblings

So I know I have not actually written more than a few sentences in the past month or so. Lets just say thing have been a bit strained/draining to say the least. As most people know my grandfather, Denny Proctor, died the week after Travis and I moved to Colorado, Travis has not been working, we just went to Cancun and work well it is work. My brain has been all over the place, one day I am fine and loving every minute of life and the next, well, every little thing seems to send me over the edge. I just don't get it and try my hardest to maintain a sense of normalcy.

I have been thinking about things and I know a lot of it has to do with the stress of knowing that my income is the sole and steady income that is holding the pieces together and for those who have been in a one income situation knows that it can be a very tough thing. Add traveling on top of that back to Oregon, to Mexico and now Christmas is coming and well stress, stress, stress......Thank goodness for the gym and food.

Let me say that the move to Colorado for me and Travis has been nothing but wonderful for us both mentally and for our relationship. We no longer pick at each, argue like we did, or just feel constantly on edge. We no longer feel like we are scraping the bottom of the barrel and that we are moving along in our goals in life. We have already made a few good friends and with hopefully being here for the next month we can really start to become involved in a church, maybe a soccer team for Travis and well I am looking at taking a part time job to allow us some extra money in our budgeting.

Cancun was great as you can see from the pictures and it was a great stress reliever and break that Travis and I needed. Honestly when I say I have been difficult to deal with, I am not exegerating. I feel like I am doing it all sometimes and that I take that out on Travis and that is not fair to him. It is just so hard sometimes to look at the good things you have in life when it seems that so much is falling apart or rough no matter how hard you try. Well luckily I have a wonderful man who always helps me try to see the best in life, and he is really helping me through one of the toughest times I have been through lately.

So now I need to finally fall asleep and get ready for another day at the office.